You ask how was it
and I wonder what should I compare it to
Honestly I was lost in the world
A place that painted the present and past with the same brush
You didn’t tell me to hush but my lips couldn’t move
You took your time to undress me but I felt the same cold chill grip my body
I was frozen shut with nothing but my legs open
You were gentle but my mind made you stronger
You were close to me but I saw a stranger
You were invited, so I could not be an ungrateful host,
how would I rescind your invitation
You were my first time since that incident
and wether or not you knew I was afraid of touch
Your hands showed no restraint and made the places he touched hurt once more
With each thrust I relived my death
Making love to a corpse,
you saw my tearing eyes as a sign of mirrored emotions
Were you scared like I was
Did you feel hands that weren’t there
Hear sounds louder than your own breathing
Could you have felt the “Stop” my mind screamed in my head but voice couldn’t say
Tomorrow you will come again and ask for what you feel you deserve
Because I will feel I need to move on I will let you
But don’t ask how was it
I was lost in the world,
I was anywhere,
I wanted to be everywhere
I needed to be somewhere
but there
Jade Novelist ©️ 2017