You ask how was it

and I wonder what should I compare it to

Honestly I was lost in the world

A place that painted the present and past with the same brush

You didn’t tell me to hush but my lips couldn’t move

You took your time to undress me but I felt the same cold chill grip my body

I was frozen shut with nothing but my legs open

You were gentle but my mind made you stronger

You were close to me but I saw a stranger

You were invited, so I could not be an ungrateful host,

how would I rescind your invitation

You were my first time since that incident

and wether or not you knew I was afraid of touch

Your hands showed no restraint and made the places he touched hurt once more

With each thrust I relived my death

Making love to a corpse,

you saw my tearing eyes as a sign of mirrored emotions

Were you scared like I was

Did you feel hands that weren’t there

Hear sounds louder than your own breathing

Could you have felt the “Stop” my mind screamed in my head but voice couldn’t say

Tomorrow you will come again and ask for what you feel you deserve

Because I will feel I need to move on I will let you

But don’t ask how was it

I was lost in the world,

I was anywhere,

I wanted to be everywhere

I needed to be somewhere

but there


Jade Novelist ©️ 2017


To read more poems from the #MemorableAmnesia, you can visit and download the anthology:
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